The (Un)said

Please give me strength. I (desperately) need to be strong enough to tide over these few months and I'm (not) just referring to my studies. (I'm sorry that) I'm just not steady enough in so many aspects in my messed up life. (I'm sorry that) I've been neglecting and have been neglected by people who matters most to me. (I hate it that) I allow myself to be affected by them, because it just means that I (stupidly) let myself be vulnerable (again). I (hate myself for) being played a fool, and permitting myself to be used (over and over again). I feel so much contempt for my weakness, that I think I'm brimming with self-loathing.

I'm (not) strong enough. All I want to do is break down and cry.