I have endless tasks to fulfill,
fun to be enjoyed,
movies to be caught,
photos to be snapped,
idle times to be spent,
food to be eaten,
games to be played,
serials to catch up,
shopping to be done,
chalets to be tonned,
books to be savoured,
weights to be lost,
exercise to be done,
mahjong games to be won ( HAHA, CARO )
and overall,
FUN TO BE HAD.



But the damned Os are standing in the way.
Bloody hell.

Grad night. 21.10.05

naturally, everyone went trigger-happy. flashes everywhere in the auditorium, you would have thought bae-fucking yongjun came in.

yeah well.



given the mood, everybody got teary. hugs were given and recieved. promises made, but will they be kept?

I hate pooping over parties, but the damned school havent got a clue, instead of playing the corny yet neverfails VitC- graduation, they played some song by celine dion and whatsoever by whosoever. Like, HELLO. I was prepared to sob like a shamin' baby, but OH NO THERE"S NO SONG.

Nevertheless, there are some who shed tears, guess i got to work on my emotion factor. But the feeling in my heart is bittersweet, and tugs painfully every second. how i wanted to cry too, to hug all my dears to tell them i love them admist all my tears. BUT I JUST COULDNT.

):

Looking around the hall, i realised how much i owe Unity. How many memories were encapsulated here, how many laughters, how much tears. How many screams and how many smiles.

How many friends.

When i was home, i blasted The VitC song in my comp and started to reminsce.

It hit me like a truck,

Im never going to have a chance to sing our school song again.
Im never going to walk by fourseven early in the morning, looking at those dears. Tong making Mel and Ying laugh. Han shushing them cuz she wants to study. Caro NEVER there cuz she's always late.

Into My own beloved nest, eugene yelling HEY TZEMIN! everytime i step in.
Shahril listening to his mp3.
Don rushing his geography homework.
Waiming and Bahri fooling around.
Joyce pouring over her idol mags.
Denise sleeping LIKE ALWAYS. (:
Pris not there yet, as she's always fashionably late, reaching the class at the last possible minute. Fengkai's booming voice to be heard from the room all the way to the Yangtze river in Goddamned China.
Zhiling's unearthly screams whenever some bug got the better of her.
Yuting's laughter, scaring the wits out of everyone.
Jeenson and John, teasing anyone in the vicinity, evoking laughter from Andrew, guoxiang and their fellow musketeers.
Karen's yells, cuz she's ALWAYS getting bullied.


Mr Tan's sesame street's antics and his sweet dimpled smile that we have came to LOVE AND HATE.
Mrs Tan's lovely smile, and losing her voice everytime she teaches us.
Mr Fan incessant nagging about how we should ASK HIM QUESTIONS, even if we dont take physics.
Mrs Kumar's no-nonsense sharp voice, silencing the class effectively.
Mrs Quah's high pitched voice, telling us about YET ANOTHER MOCK EXAM.
Mrs Chan fingernails-against-the-chalkboard voice, warning the class NOT to pon her Geog AEP.


How i will miss, how i will cherish.

The comfortable feeling of belonging, the lovely feeling of being loved by your friends.
The easy going demeanour, knowing full well you can yell to the class with no sense of self-consciousness or shyness.
Will I ever be able to do that in my new class next year?

Will I ever be able to walk in and know you made a difference and you truly belonged, their smiles, their laughters. How i love. (:

I will miss so much,
i will miss my stingrays binges with qiaozhen.
I will miss john mocking me as i lost to him in another maths test.
I will miss karen's incessant teasing, making me laugh everytime.
i will miss pricilla's adorable antics, exasperating me everytime.
i will miss my crude+gossipy conversations with my brother, peppered with fucks and bloody hells. RIGHT SHAHRIL? (:
I will miss Bahri my hunky babe, with his superlong lashes. His singing and his guitar-strumming.
I will miss Don and his superniceguy attitude. ALWAYS willing to place his ipod mini at my mercy. (:
I will even miss waiming's bloody irritating teases, always getting me all fired up.
I will miss eugene's NON-GENTLEMANLY attitude towards me, always treating me like im his guy friend. ASS.


I will miss being able to stand on a chair and shouting to the class with no fear that no one is going to even bother about me.
You guys built up my confidence, how could i not remember?


When i thought about all these, i broke down and sobbed.
I cried like i never cried before.


1/8,2/8,3/7,4/6.
Thank Lord.
He gave me four wonderful years, one hell of a secondary school life.

I dont think it can ever be beaten,
and that you guys can ever be replaced.

It struck me a few chapters ago that I had forgotten what day it was today.
It was on the part where I was pondering over Double circulation In Mammals, that I realized,

Hey, isnt today Saturday?
Oh No its not. Kidscentral is not playing Pokemon.
Its err..ahh..um, Monday? Oh Tuesay !

Promptly satisfied with my brillant deduction, I determinedly shoved my wavering concentration back to the fascinating text on why our busy blood cells needed to zip through the heart twice in one circulation.

Probably those little red dudes are on steroids. (:


Oh no,

that wasnt even remotely amusing.
*puts head in hands and shakes in despair*


Im going off the edge,
that i am.

never mind,
i set up a cbox.

For the love of God,
please bloody hell spend jst 30 seconds tagging something alright.

it doesnt take much of an effort to make me happy. (=

I cant get the haloscan up.

Any volunteers will be greatly appreciated
and rewarded......





BY MY LOVE! (=

WHAT? you thought i was going to PAY you?

( Sweet sixteenth, jas. May Friday noon rawk. (= )

Imagine.

Since young, I had a hankering for lovely hotel rooms.
Quirky, yes. I know that too. (=

I love the soft goose feather pillows, fluffy and sweet-smelling.
I adore the lovely oak furnitures.
I find joy in padding over thick carpeting.
I delight in the opulent bathroom, gleaming metal fixtures, smooth marble floor.
AND MY ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE,
the thick, fluffy and every so BIG white hotel towels.
Wrapping myself in it, I breathe in the clean refreshing scent. Intoxicating, the fresh smell of pure smell of cleanliness.

Yes, I have not missed out the finer point of hotel rooms.
How its miraculously and magically spick and span after the morning's disarray.
Magic little helpers, nimble little fingers and quick little feets.

I adore hotel rooms. (=

Emotionally wraught. Over-wrung.

I rode the train from YewTee to Newton, alighted, got back again, rode to Orchard.
Hesitated.
Town? My Os is looming over ever so omniously.
I opened my bag, saw my prelims results, the red scrawls mocking me.

" You think you will be able to get an A1? Keep dreaming !"
My amaths paper seemed to be sneering.

"You think you can get 10 points like Jieying? Dont be so unrealistic LA. "
Those red scribbles, dancing around, chanting like cruel kindergarden kids, taunting, scorning. Whispering to me, Im going to screw the most important exam in my school life.
Laughing, pointing, smirking.


I zipped it up, got out, and waited for the train heading back to Woodlands.